Out of the Mummy Mind

I overheard a conversation the other day.  Someones daughter was starting Uni and they were saying how she doesn’t know how to cook, clean, do washing etc. A few other people were then saying how their kids (young ones as well) can do this that and the other.

I sat back listening thinking ‘do I do too much for my kids?’ Ruby can do the basics obviously – dress herself, brush her teeth etc etc. But I wouldn’t expect her to wash up or load the dishwasher.  Or put her clothes away.  I never ask her to tidy her room or make her bed. I do all that.  But what is acceptable?  Whats too much or too little?

Ruby ‘helps’ Adam and I to do things like cooking or she’ll help Adam build something but her attention span isn’t the best and gets bored easy so the minute she doesn’t want to, we don’t make her.

My parents did a lot for me and my brothers/sisters.  But I have to admit when I left home I didn’t have a clue how to cook.  I remember ringing my mum to ask her how to do oven chips!  I also had no clue to use the washing machine.  I knew how to separate the clothes but not what to do once they were in the machine! (#OMG)

But I’ve figured it out…eventually.

There’s no right or wrong way.  I didn’t sit and think those people talking were expecting too much of their children.  Quite the opposite, it made me question if I do too much. But that’s my role isn’t it?  I’m here to look after my children, provide for them, teach and guide them.

But it has got me thinking….assessing my own life, my role, how I have become, how I want to be….

Its been 14 months since I had Matilda and I’m starting to get a little frustrated with myself now.

To put it bluntly…I’ve bloody let myself go.  I used to always make an effort. Have painted nails, hair done, nice clothes. These days I wear the same 2 outfits on rotation, my nails need some serious attention and my hair only gets washed twice a week. Okay, so that’s exaggerating slightly (or maybe not – i’ll let you decide ha)

Some of you will be sat there thinking ‘but you have kids, its ok’ and I don’t disagree be but its not me.  Its not what feels comfortable to me. I mean, I’m not saying I’m usually cool or trendy…in fact quite the opposite.  I’m the most uncool person ever but my point is I made an effort.

I’ve got to know a gorgeous lady at work who is very much into clean eating, healthy lifestyle, cleansed mind and life.  We have discovered that we are so alike its refreshing (clearly not in the healthy eating) but in other ways.  I am all for a cleansed mind and being super organised and we seem to be similar in our parenting styles. But the point I want to make is she has inspired me to try this clean eating way of living.  We have both discovered Niomi Smart the you tuber and she has recently brought a book out called Eat Smart.  Its about a plant based way of life which I was a bit dubious about before but since Matilda is dairy intolerant it fits perfectly and I want to find some recipes for every day meals that we can all try and not have to make different meals. So I’m thinking I might buy it and give it a try.

As for exercising, I used to love running and felt like I had so much time for it but these days I’d be lucky if I got 5 minutes to do some star jumps.  I can’t even get my head in the mindset of dieting and exercise and what’s even more gutting is that I weigh more now than I did right after having Matilda.  I think I must be the only person to put weight ON after having a baby ha ha.

But no more!!! I’ve got to get out of the typical Mummy mind and try a cleaner way of life.  This doesn’t mean neglecting my babies obviously, this just means making more time for myself, being self disciplined.

Live, Love and Laughter

Helen x




2 thoughts on “Out of the Mummy Mind

  1. Hi Helen
    There is nothing wrong with how you are bringing up your gorgeous girls. It doesn’t hurt for kids to have a chore or two and at Ruby’s age it doesn’t have to be much. When they get a bit older it is good to let them learn to cook and clean and sew and iron or do the laundry, not just giving you more time to do the things you enjoy and want, but it is teaching them life skills which they will need to know soon enough in the future. It can be a fun thing to teach them. You and Adam are awesome parents and whatever feels right with you and your family is all right to go with. Lots of love to you all xxxx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Helen, you are a wonderful mum and wife…..you don’t get a handbook when you have a baby, but it is a learning process…..and never stops!! Just keep doing what you are doing, and you will see light at the end of the long tunnel – and then you will have time for yourself!! love you my darling girl xxx

    Liked by 1 person

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